Feeling quite down now..

sometimes I just feel that life is not going my way..Is it me? what on earth is wrong.

The semester is coming to a close, and I have met 2 shitty people for projects. Why on earth are there such people. I really just can't get it.

#1 CRIMINAL

This particular woman is an exchange student from Poland. Superbly lazy.
She does not even bother to get a handphone, (while u are overseas??) and didn't even bring her laptop during meetings. I think not having a laptop is ok, but you look totally lost during discussions and you never contribute anything. ZILCH.

The only thing I could bear to let go for you to do is a PRESS RELEASE for the project. You are a MASTERS in Journalism, I am pretty sure you can draw up an excellent one. What did I get? A piece of shit. Which Press release will have a freaking table and bullet points inside. The content were just copied and pasted from what you provided for the main report body copy. Fucking lazy. I even Copied and find links of press release examples, tell you from start to end about how it shld be like. Redo already still low grade. I couldn't tahan and did it myself.

If you think you can wile your way through Singapore system like that, be glad I am giving something abit more than 0 for peer evaluation.


#2 CRIMINAL

This is a more recent case. Just a week back when this shitty person revealed his true colors. I kinda surmised and caught onto a bit of his true character before the final project was due. MAKING EMPTY promises.. make himself sound very big ("oh I will email the lecturer.. i will go library to find materials.")

HE IS A MEGA PIECE OF DA BIAN!!

Seriously. Ok I thought he was quite nice at first, but he was just another irresponsible person.

HE volunteered to compile the final report. Ok. That's your decision.

Everyone gave him the parts and he was supposed to compile it, send to everyone to edit. I asked him "So when can you upload it? Must be asap so we all can look at it."

" OH. I'm out. Dinner time baa"

DINNER. ok.. thinking it must be 7 plus or 8 the latest, considering this is the day before pass-up, I am a worrier, and this is worrying for me. Yet I do not want to seem like a naggy mother, so I said ok.

8pm: sent message.

No Reply.

9 plus: sent another message. No reply and I quickly contacted another group mate.

10 plus: CALLED HIM. No answer.

I was hopping mad and panicking. I DON't have his part and no compiling is being done. his prt is not say very small and insignificant. IT IS THE LITERATURE REVIEW.

I felt so fucked up and decided to do it myself. Started researching, and writing it up. Slept at 3 plus. And left him a freaking angry msg.

The next day I woke up with his msg: " Sorry I was not with my phone. I just uploaded"

WTMF?

I took a look, guess what. His lit review was just 1 and a half pages long. DOUBLE SPACED.

ARGHHH. After that had to rush the exec summary and conclusion also. We handed it up late.. and that shitty specimen did not even bother to wake up early to ask how are things.. need help, or whatever. NOTHING!!!

HOW CAN THERE BE SUCH CREATURE ON

EARTH???

I am such a mild tempered person, and I don't believe anyone won't be angry. COZ I AM.

I totally F-ed up the presentation today also coz that person didn't time himself also. It is also my fault coz I cracked under the pressure of time limit. I was rambling like a total fool.

Sigh. I am really feeling very fed up now. I SO want an A. I gotta get it in order to pull my cap points up. Do you know how helpless I feel when I think about it. Even if I get all As I think it can only increase by 0.something. I have so much to go before even qualifying for a 2nd upper. I feel so dejected, so stupid. I feel like I really suck at all these..I really feel like giving up. I just wanna get the Bachelor and go. I really can't imagine the ramifications. The scoldings.. the blamings that will be ceaseless for my whole life.

Who am I getting the As for? Myself? My family?

Why am I here. .I just wanna disappear.