Yet again, have neglected this space of words.

I guess I will make it a point to update more often.. given the nature of my current job and also because I have more time to kill now that I'm single. Need to voice out more.. especially through words before my language skills start to rust and I go crazy.


Job-wise:

I am into 4 months plus into my new job... where my responsibilities include conference planning, PR and marketing. Pros of the job - flexi hours, able to travel around the world, great potential to meet government and business leaders across a wide range of industries, excitement and lots to learn. Probably can make me more streetwise. Cons of the job - flexi hours, loneliness, independence, self-motivated work. Besides me, my 'company' is just the VP and then the Chairman. That's it. Hence, when I'm down and low, when I need to bitch, when I need motivation, when I need to just gossip, there are just four walls. Maybe I should start thinking of adopting netball like Tom Hanks as a companion and draw a hunky daopok on it.  -_-

But when there is work to do, it becomes so busy that I feel so alive and adrenaline is always pumping in my veins. I feel very accomplished when the work is finally done. And the best thing of the whole thing - the accomplishment is achieved overseas and ends with a great holiday at the country where I'm at. ;)

So far, I've been to Jakarta and Sydney. Phase 2 is in the planning stages and what's on the drawing board is China, India, Africa (Zambia or South Africa), Middle East (Oman), Europe (Portugal, or Serbia or Switzerland), and Malaysia i think. haha~ So many cultures to be exposed to.. something which not many jobs can offer me.

Guess this is life's rule of thumb - nothing can be perfect. There is always the good and bad for every single thing. Eg. traveling is so awesome and enriching, but expect lesser zeroes in your saving account/ blogging is such a great way to spew out your thoughts within and share with friends, but expect forever storage in google's database and infringing of privacy..Give and take.. depends how much you can tolerate the bad and make the best out of the good portions:) and with that.. comes my next category: Love.


Love-wise:

I'm a mess these past few months. Met some really great people, met some really horrible and shitified human beings. I have made a decision to move on from a very precious 7 year relationship due to not being able to tolerate the bad and my heart's infidelity. I have grown just a little bit stronger from this period of time.. and steadfast in my decision making.. and also grown weaker with the loss of a precious love. So many memories, so many promises made and a future that we have envisioned together. I've decided to give that all up. Stupid me? Yes. without a doubt because I still love him. But I believe this will help me gain more knowledge as to what I really want out of my life, what kind of partner I want in future and be less dependent on love.

Greatest advice I've gotten out of this whole episode - 'There is more to life than just BGR.'

So fucking true. Don't be so desperate to be attached. Yes, I definitely want someone to be by my side when I'm low, to share when I'm happy, to run into someone's arms when I need a hug. But there is much more to life than all these.

My aim now: to fulfill my own goals, establish a more stable career and meet more people.. because there is indeed a bigger world out there.

Many people at my age of 25 in Singapore probably are living a life of :

• Get married to my boyfriend
• Get a flat
• Rise up the corporate ladder

Guess that's the norm. Even my grandma wants to pray for me to get more Tao HUA (love luck). OH please. I have enough this half a year. I'm a bit scared and numb already. Although I currently kinda like someone who likes me in return..but there is no desire at all from my side to be attached (at least for now), and I'm sincerely glad.

I'm sure there's more than life than the above three points. We are often so stuck inside our own day-to-day things and routine and work responsibilities that I wonder.. is that it? I want to know more, I want to get out. I want more more more. But it is oh so easy to just fall back into the routine and get lazy. How do you become someone who matters? How do you become SOMEONE even? with A life worth living?

I need to get my thinking straight and be a better person. I need to cultivate that hunger to learn. Hope it isn't too late to do so. :):)