im feeling so unhappy and have no place to express it except this derelict blog with cobwebs hanging from it due to my lack of usage/update.

i don't understand why i feel so lonely.

should i be voicing out my unhappiness that you're always so busy?

should i be more understanding when you have all the right reasons to be busy due to work?

am i still facing transitional problems? or is it just my work is so boring that i have too much time to think about such useless stuff and feel so lousy?

where were the really happy times? where were the times when you were so sweet? how often do i actually get to talk sweet nothings to you.. or rather YOU talking sweet nothings to me. Am i expecting too much?

from few messages + calls a day, to at least one phone call a day, to few phone calls a week.

what next? a month?

When I see stuff i wanna share with you or reminds me of you, i message you and wanna tell u everything. But when I see the lack of reply, I get so irritated. I feel unanswered. I feel neglected. I feel like im talking to a wall. I feel alone. Soon enough, I just get fed up. What's the use of messaging like a stupid desperate fool?

maybe im a too needy person. maybe i need attention. Maybe i need to stop this stupid thinking of mine. But then again, we hardly meet. if lucky, once a week.

i can't stop the tears from falling. it's been too long... i've reached my point. i feel so unhappy.
O tears just fall down my cheeks and sweep all these bitterness i feel.

tomorrow's valentine's day.

no plans. no mentions. no nothing. yes, its a capitalist day. I saw a tweet from my fren that says as long as both parties are content and happy, any and everyday should be a v day.

the problem is exactly that. Are both parties content and happy? I know Im not. At least not today. At least not tomorrow.

Oh let me sleep on it. Let me forget about it. Resolve me from this turmoil within.